0589 - Vulgar

The weekly Staff meeting here did not run smoothly. Our Revered Investment Guru (the R.I.G.) was in a snit, partly due to the yield on U.S. Treasury bonds rising, and partly because of the brisk dismissal of the CEO of Boeing, a randy gent. The bond irritant was that the rise in rates was some three years late, according to the R.I.G., who had been duly punished by betting too soon. Our Ethicist, more given to meditation, fell into a dispute about the firing of CEO Stonecipher [good name] for fooling around with a female exec. The R.I.G. thought that CEOs ought to be judged by the money they made for stockholders, not their moral purity. The Ethicist thought that CEOs, like baseball players, ought to be pillars of virtue. The Senior Counsel, called in to arbitrate, pointed out that no one knew what really went on, and besides, he ruled, the error was not in the hanky-panky, but in committing the liaison to the firm’s e-mails. Hence, said Counsel, if an exec doesn’t know better than to footle about by e-mail, where Attorneys General excavate daily, the exec is stupid and should begone. The OO said we should stand for virtue coupled with silence, and thanks to Barron’s, was able to quote Cardinal Richelieu: “Never write a letter and never destroy one.” Does that apply to columns?

Meanwhile, the Washington, DC scene was even more disgusting than usual with the behavior of all parties verging on the nauseous. The Republicans, abandoning all traditional “Conservative” values, seem determined to drive the deficit to new heights (or depths), a policy the bond markets well understand, as noted above. The Democrats, given a great gift by the fuzzy B*sh-announced policy of repairing Social Security by trashing it, instead refused to admit that if everybody lives longer, pension costs must rise. Meanwhile, the Prez seemed to have trouble with arithmetic, as usual. Bah!

And turning back to the U.S. Congress, they are behaving as badly as ever they have. Not a day passes without some scheme to increase the deficit by subsidizing the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Current calls to end sugar and cotton subsidies are of course attacked viciously, while the White House wants to increase deficits forever by permanently excusing anybody rich from paying taxes. Time to go sell short the T-Bonds, there’s no hope. Come back, Bob Taft!

Well, we wanted to say something about Vulgarity – no deficit there. The TV continues to provide extremely stupid and vulgar programs: who with any taste would watch “Fear Factor” or similar “so-called “reality” garbage? The Congress is no help, busying itself with raising the fines for using bad words or showing parts of Janet Jackson. And speaking of Jacksons, and we don’t want to, did you see the pictures of that noodle arriving at his trial in blue pajama bottoms? Even CNBC, the R.I.G.’s daily fave, has terminated “Bullseye”, its only intelligent after-market discussion hour and instead gives us Larry Kudlow, a noisy and mannerless boor who talks not making money, but only no-tax agitprop. Bah!

Of all current vulgarities, the worst are the computer games, where the usual theme is to blow imaginary enemies into disgusting and graphic bits of cyberflesh. And that’s when they aren’t teaching kids how to steal cars [Grand Theft Auto] or participate in other illegal activities. If you don’t believe our strictures, visit the appropriate stores. That’s the real porno.

Next time: Change [OO #590]

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