The entire Staff was smiling, and met for a congratulatory glass of Jim Beam Black Label (the bourbon of choice here). The occasion was the opportunity to issue the JFGDF [Jerry Falwell God Damn Fool] award for the first time in many months. This award is not lightly given, and today's recipient is the Reverend Pat Robertson, another player in the lucrative TV preacher field. You Readers, always attentive to major news, probably saw Pat saying that the United States should "take out" the Venezuelan chief. It is somewhat startling to hear a Reverend ignore the teachings of love and forgiveness and call for an assassination. Our Research Staff rushed to the concordance [fine word] at the rear of the Bible, but did not find any reference to Jesus teaching when unsuitable political leaders should be offed. The religious right, which would have been much happier fighting perilous stem cells, was much confused, and was heard to say that Pat was "getting on". He sure is, and it's about time to get him off, too.

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